Domestic violence affects children—even if they were never physically hurt. Witnessing abuse, hearing threats, or living in fear can create long-term emotional and developmental impacts. But with the right support, children can heal and grow in safety.

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• Nightmares or sleep issues

• Aggression, tantrums, or withdrawal

• Fear of separation or being “bad”

• Academic or attention difficulties

• Mimicking abusive behavior

• Emotional shutdown or overreaction to conflict

• These are signs of trauma—not disobedience

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• Safety and stability—routine meals, school, playtime

• Reassurance—remind them often: “You’re safe now” and “It wasn’t your fault”

• Validation—allow them to express fear, sadness, or anger without judgment

• Structure—predictability builds emotional trust

• Permission to enjoy life again—let them laugh, play, and be kids

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• Keep lines of communication open—ask “How are you feeling today?”

• Spend quality time together—even small moments help

• Avoid speaking negatively about the other parent (focus on behaviors)

• Let teachers or caregivers know what’s going on—they can offer extra support

• Create a “calm corner” or emotional toolkit with books, soft toys, or art supplies

• Use age-appropriate books and stories that talk about feelings and safety

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• Play therapy—helps younger children express through toys and storytelling

• Art or music therapy—for creative emotional processing

• Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT)—teaches older kids how to manage thoughts and feelings

• Family counselling—strengthens parent-child bonds post-trauma

• Group support—helps children see they’re not alone

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• If your child shows ongoing signs of distress:

  • Changes in eating or sleeping

  • Aggression or defiance

  • Regression (e.g., bedwetting, baby talk)

  • Anxiety, fear of being alone, or depression

• You can ask your doctor, school, or local shelter for referrals

• Early intervention = better long-term outcomes

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• ✅ Children need safety, love, and structure to heal

• ✅ Witnessing violence affects their mind and body—but recovery is possible

• ✅ Encourage open feelings, routines, and age-appropriate therapy

• ✅ You don’t need to do it alone—Ontario has free and low-cost services

• ✅ Your support is their most powerful healing tool

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• Kids Help Phone – 1-800-668-6868 or text CONNECT to 686868

• Boost Child & Youth Advocacy Centre – Trauma services for children

• Family Service Ontario – Parenting and child therapy support

• 211 Ontario – Find mental health and DV support programs

• Assaulted Women’s Helpline – 1-866-863-0511

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The single most important factor in a child's recovery is having a strong, stable, and supportive relationship with their safe parent (you). Your well-being is directly linked to theirs, so seeking your own support and counselling is also essential.

No. Children who witness violence are often confused and overwhelmed by big feelings they can't control. Aggression is a common trauma response and a sign that they need help learning to process their experiences in a healthy way. It is not a sign that they are "bad" or will become abusive themselves.

Without support, witnessing domestic violence can lead to long-term issues like anxiety, depression, difficulty in school, and challenges forming healthy relationships. However, with the support of a safe parent and professional help, children can be incredibly resilient and can heal and thrive.

Some children internalize their trauma and may not show obvious outward signs of distress. Even if they "seem fine," it is still highly recommended to have them speak with a counsellor who specializes in trauma. This can give them a safe space to process what they have experienced.

Your local women's shelter is the best place to start; they almost always have free, specialized counselling programs for children who have witnessed abuse. You can also call 211 Ontario to find other non-profit community health centres that offer free or low-cost therapy.

It is extremely rare for a child to be asked to testify in family court. If a judge needs to understand the child's perspective, they will typically appoint the Office of the Children's Lawyer (OCL) or a social worker to speak with the child in a safe, neutral setting and prepare a report for the court.